I just had to give a recorded testimony of the car accident to the adjuster of the BMW owner... I have to admit, this car thing is really working my nerves. It can make me feel so anxious. I just figure I have nothing more to lose... the car is already gone and we have no money he can take anyways... ahhhhhhhhh. It turns out both cars were totaled so now we are dealing with who's insurance claim pays for what, whos liable, etc. ahhhhhhhhhhhh.
Aside from that, my firm's Christmas party is this afternoon... I can barely wait for the holiday to be here. Kevin and I can't wait to see family and friends again- its made this last week dreadfully slow. Friday night we are celebrating our first Christmas together, before we head out Saturday for Kansas. Kevin keeps buying me gifts... I can't keep up.
Thursday, December 22, 2005
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
The Nissan Eulogy
Our 1995 Nissan Altima (sometimes referred to as "The Cloud") passed away this Monday morning, Dec 12th 2005, quite suddenly and unexpectantly. Our almost three year relationship ended abruptly when a blue/silver BMW beheaded her in a nearly head on collision. The Nissan is mostly still intact... just the most important and valuable parts probably are no longer usable. The damage will be far more than the worth of the car... hence the diagnoses that the Nissan is now "dead". Time seems to freeze as the Nissan let out her last breath when the air bag exploded near my face.
I feel sad sometimes when I think about how quickly the Nissan was destroyed. One minute I was walking to my car to head off to work, and the next I was standing on the street's curb, staring in shock at my car as the transmission and radiator fluid poured out. Neither of the drivers were seriously injured… he did have a small gash in his head from his air bag but he was quickly calmed and treated. I had some soreness of neck and back but after visiting the chiropractor the next day, was almost as good as usual.
The neighbors, our landlord, the wife of the BMW owner, firemen, and police officers were all very kind, acting as though this was something that happened every day. In fact, I heard more than once, "welcome to LA" as sightseers passed by and stopped to see the wreckage.
Kevin and I currently have a rented car to use for a few days and then we will figure out how to live in this huge, auto-land, with one car… at least for now. We are thankful for God's mercy and provision as we had just finalized car insurance nearly a week before and no serious injuries were caused. No blame has been placed yet, I think both drivers did the best they could at the time. We will find out the insurance company's response in a few days though.
The story (in a nutshell)… I was coming out of our apartment parking lot, trying to make a left hand turn. The street I was turning onto to has poor visibility b/c cars park along both sides. I am always nervous pulling out… looking both ways for sometimes several minutes before heading out. This time, I thought I was clear, after watching a black SUV park further up the road one way, and watching the nearest light turn red the other way. I didn't see the BMW until my air bag exploded.
And that is our latest LA adventure/experience. We have survived yet again. Thanks for all your calls, emails, support and prayers…. We really appreciate you all. And remember, especially as you see the pictures below, that I really am okay.
The entrance to our parking spot... we drive underneath another complex to get to our apt in the back... this is where I was pulling out from to make a left turn.
I feel sad sometimes when I think about how quickly the Nissan was destroyed. One minute I was walking to my car to head off to work, and the next I was standing on the street's curb, staring in shock at my car as the transmission and radiator fluid poured out. Neither of the drivers were seriously injured… he did have a small gash in his head from his air bag but he was quickly calmed and treated. I had some soreness of neck and back but after visiting the chiropractor the next day, was almost as good as usual.
The neighbors, our landlord, the wife of the BMW owner, firemen, and police officers were all very kind, acting as though this was something that happened every day. In fact, I heard more than once, "welcome to LA" as sightseers passed by and stopped to see the wreckage.
Kevin and I currently have a rented car to use for a few days and then we will figure out how to live in this huge, auto-land, with one car… at least for now. We are thankful for God's mercy and provision as we had just finalized car insurance nearly a week before and no serious injuries were caused. No blame has been placed yet, I think both drivers did the best they could at the time. We will find out the insurance company's response in a few days though.
The story (in a nutshell)… I was coming out of our apartment parking lot, trying to make a left hand turn. The street I was turning onto to has poor visibility b/c cars park along both sides. I am always nervous pulling out… looking both ways for sometimes several minutes before heading out. This time, I thought I was clear, after watching a black SUV park further up the road one way, and watching the nearest light turn red the other way. I didn't see the BMW until my air bag exploded.
And that is our latest LA adventure/experience. We have survived yet again. Thanks for all your calls, emails, support and prayers…. We really appreciate you all. And remember, especially as you see the pictures below, that I really am okay.
The entrance to our parking spot... we drive underneath another complex to get to our apt in the back... this is where I was pulling out from to make a left turn.
My car is shown above and then the BMW below...
But remember... I'm okay! Just a little sore...
On another note, here are some pictures from LA that we took this last weekend.
Shown above is my favorite flower in LA... and I haven't figured out what it is called yet. Any ideas?
It is unusual to find a tree that has leaves that actually act like its winter... so I had to take a picture of one. This is in a garden at the Getty museum.
I took this picture for Jill... I was thinking of you at the garden and took this picture :) Its not as good as yours though!
Kevin making a carrot cake... I've been (trying to) teach him everything Cindy and Heather taught me.
I love you all and love you and can't wait to come to KS soon!
Thursday, December 08, 2005
What can I control?
This blog thing is starting to feel more like my personal journal... when good things happen I forget to write or I just don't feel like it... but on the heavier days I tend to become overwelmed w/ the intensity of my thoughts.
Last night, today looked adventurous and inviting... but then 12 am passed and it took its own turn. Kevin and I are going to a premier tonight of the movie Chronicles of Narnia. We've never been to one before so we don't know what to expect... red carpet? The actors and producers? Pieces of the sets on display? I'll let you know tomorrow how it went... if only I can get that far in the day.
I decided to try out the bus system on my way to work... since the bus doesn't really come near enough to my apt to walk to, Kevin dropped me off at the first bus stop. I had barely slept the night before, had a headache and possibly a fever, and was anxious... was this bus thing really going to work? I felt silly... especially since in Prague, bus and tram were the only way to really get around. I should know how to do this, and yet still I felt hesitant. I got on and five minutes later the bus broke down. What are the chances of that happening today, I thought to myself. An hour and a half later I was finally walking into work... just a little late :)
I find LA gets me aggitated in ways I didn't expect. The other week, as I drove home in heavy traffic, I became so frustrated I actually yelled in my car. Not just once either. I'd had enough. Let me go. Get out of my way. And the car sat in idle, waiting for the miles of cars in front of me to creep forward. I thought I would literally explode. I could feel the anxiety boiling underneath my skin. What has LA done to me?
What do bus adventures and traffic have in common? Well actually a lot, but I wonder if you are wondering how I will connect them with control. The other day in my car I thought of our group of friends that went to Indonesia and spent 14 hours (or however long... lets just say a LONG time) in the bus to get there (after flying however long first of course.) I thought to myself, "Well if this was Indonesia I'd be fine... I'd expect this two hour holdup as part of the adventure and plow on). But b/c it's in LA... I'm going to explode. Is that not reason to begin to worry? What about being in a different country changes my attitude? my expectations? my time?
The anwser... what I feel in control of. I can't control travel time in Indonesia... its a well known and accepted fact... so it wouldn't get to me. But.... for some odd reason, I fight intensely and dramatically for control of travel time in LA. Even as I was yelling in my car the other day, I thought, "Why can't I just let it go?"
If only I could have my "Indonesia perspective" all the time...
Last night, today looked adventurous and inviting... but then 12 am passed and it took its own turn. Kevin and I are going to a premier tonight of the movie Chronicles of Narnia. We've never been to one before so we don't know what to expect... red carpet? The actors and producers? Pieces of the sets on display? I'll let you know tomorrow how it went... if only I can get that far in the day.
I decided to try out the bus system on my way to work... since the bus doesn't really come near enough to my apt to walk to, Kevin dropped me off at the first bus stop. I had barely slept the night before, had a headache and possibly a fever, and was anxious... was this bus thing really going to work? I felt silly... especially since in Prague, bus and tram were the only way to really get around. I should know how to do this, and yet still I felt hesitant. I got on and five minutes later the bus broke down. What are the chances of that happening today, I thought to myself. An hour and a half later I was finally walking into work... just a little late :)
I find LA gets me aggitated in ways I didn't expect. The other week, as I drove home in heavy traffic, I became so frustrated I actually yelled in my car. Not just once either. I'd had enough. Let me go. Get out of my way. And the car sat in idle, waiting for the miles of cars in front of me to creep forward. I thought I would literally explode. I could feel the anxiety boiling underneath my skin. What has LA done to me?
What do bus adventures and traffic have in common? Well actually a lot, but I wonder if you are wondering how I will connect them with control. The other day in my car I thought of our group of friends that went to Indonesia and spent 14 hours (or however long... lets just say a LONG time) in the bus to get there (after flying however long first of course.) I thought to myself, "Well if this was Indonesia I'd be fine... I'd expect this two hour holdup as part of the adventure and plow on). But b/c it's in LA... I'm going to explode. Is that not reason to begin to worry? What about being in a different country changes my attitude? my expectations? my time?
The anwser... what I feel in control of. I can't control travel time in Indonesia... its a well known and accepted fact... so it wouldn't get to me. But.... for some odd reason, I fight intensely and dramatically for control of travel time in LA. Even as I was yelling in my car the other day, I thought, "Why can't I just let it go?"
If only I could have my "Indonesia perspective" all the time...
Wednesday, November 30, 2005
Another bad dream
Yep. It happened again... seems God always speaks the most to me when I am trying to sleep. This time it was worse though... my brother... in my dream, we almost lost him. He got so exasperated w/life that he gave up on it and tried to escape it forever. I caught him in my arms as he fell...
as if I could save him.
It broke my heart again. Again I cried out for the sake of my brother. This time I could see the darkness surrounding him, calling to him...
He thinks that these things bring him freedom...
as if I could save him.
It broke my heart again. Again I cried out for the sake of my brother. This time I could see the darkness surrounding him, calling to him...
He thinks that these things bring him freedom...
Monday, November 28, 2005
PICTURES!!!!
Yeah! I finally got a free moment to post some pics for you all... so here you go!
First of all... a wound from soccer. haha. this almost never happens (that i actually have a bruise to show) so that is why I have to brag. Since I am a little short... I am at the perfect place to get the hard elbows of girls that run w/frailing arms... urh....
I just joined another league called South Bay Sports... in Santa Monica closer to the beach, its a winter league that plays on a small field. Its been fun, although I hate to say- my team really is't that good. Its co-ed and reminds me a lot of Prague... mostly b/c all the men are international students that prefer to speak in their native language when they play. (and they always think they are the best :)
Here is a picture of our turkey! I cooked my first one ever and it actually turned out alright. I tried cooking it in a brown bag b/c our turkey roaster pan was too big to fit in our tiny oven.
Here are our thanksgiving guests... it was a smaller dinner than Kevin and I used to, since we come from large families... but it was fun! We made way TOO much food. Pierre is on the left and Erin is on the right.
A picture of our make-shift bedroom... like our curtains... the white ones are from IKEA ($12 total) and the green one- well thats our shower curtain (we can't use it in the bathroom b/c we have those glass doors now, so I figured we'd use it since it matches our bedroom great)
And a view from our bedroom door into the living/kitchen area...
A view from the front door...
Thats it for now!
First of all... a wound from soccer. haha. this almost never happens (that i actually have a bruise to show) so that is why I have to brag. Since I am a little short... I am at the perfect place to get the hard elbows of girls that run w/frailing arms... urh....
I just joined another league called South Bay Sports... in Santa Monica closer to the beach, its a winter league that plays on a small field. Its been fun, although I hate to say- my team really is't that good. Its co-ed and reminds me a lot of Prague... mostly b/c all the men are international students that prefer to speak in their native language when they play. (and they always think they are the best :)
Here is a picture of our turkey! I cooked my first one ever and it actually turned out alright. I tried cooking it in a brown bag b/c our turkey roaster pan was too big to fit in our tiny oven. 
Here are our thanksgiving guests... it was a smaller dinner than Kevin and I used to, since we come from large families... but it was fun! We made way TOO much food. Pierre is on the left and Erin is on the right.
A picture of our make-shift bedroom... like our curtains... the white ones are from IKEA ($12 total) and the green one- well thats our shower curtain (we can't use it in the bathroom b/c we have those glass doors now, so I figured we'd use it since it matches our bedroom great)
And a view from our bedroom door into the living/kitchen area...
A view from the front door...
Thats it for now!
Saturday, November 26, 2005
It's a miracle to me.
I woke up last night… another bad dream. A living nightmare actually. It’s the same one… me, my brother, and my parents.
I found myself wondering, why do people have children? Parents have this enormous responsibility… they are the first to shape their child’s worldview. Whatever your parents taught you the first few years of your life… their values, their dreams, their failures, their expectations… are what their child will spend the rest of his life walking though. I find myself thinking, I don’t want kids, I don’t want to mess them up… all I want them to know is that they are loved. They only thing that matters is if they know they are loved. This is all changing my perspective of what this upcoming “judgment day” might look like… I sincerely doubt Jesus will sit there, on His mighty throne and say “why didn’t you obey Me? Why didn’t you do this or that… lets review everything you did wrong and could have done better every day you were alive…” NO. The Jesus I want to know, the Jesus worth following and believing in… I really think would say, “Didn’t you know that I love you?”
He’ll look into the eyes of the girl that grew up by herself and see her wounded heart and the baggage that she carries, and I think His heart would have to have some sadness in it. That it’s finally the end… and this creature that He created to be so beautiful never believed, never knew, that He loved her. He’ll look into the eyes of the wealthy business man who built his own career up from nothing by himself, and say “All I wanted was to live with you.”
That’s it. No rules, no expectations, no hidden agendas. It doesn’t matter if you go to church or read the Bible, whether you go to college or if you’re polite… He’s known plenty of Christians who never did do any of these. Do you know that He loves you? Look it up for yourself, the prodigal son wasn’t polite, and he didn’t follow the rules. The prostitutes on the street most definitely didn’t go to college. And the most trusted disciples didn’t have a single Bible.
So I return to my brother and find myself crying now. Doesn’t he know the He loves him? I cry out to Jesus… “Where are You? Why aren’t You here?” And
I hear Him say, “But I already am.” I think of the picture of my brother that I saw last week, his football picture, and the youthfulness of his face. This boy that I share not even a drop of blood with, yet I feel so connected to. I would give my life in a second for him to know that he’s loved… and even as that thought crosses my mind, I heard Him say, “So would I.”
All I can do is cry… sob. I lay at the feet of Jesus and I grab His robe and just cry. I imagine myself thousands of year ago, when Jesus lived on earth. He walks by and the crowds are following Him, as they did in the typical Bible stories… and I run out to just grab on. Somehow I think that just holding on to Him is enough. And so I sit at the feet of Jesus and I grab His robe and just cry.
“Come to my brother, he needs You.” I tell Jesus… and I wait for His response. I want Him to respond like He did in the stories… I want to hear Him say Yes and see Him go. I wait in my bed as I cry for an answer… begging to hear anything, a word… I want to believe Jesus cares, that He’s already on His way to him, my brother. Instead my mind flashes to something else… my heart stops and I’m in a hospital… there’s a doctor over me saying, “It’s a miracle you’re here.”
“It’s a miracle you’re here.”
Jesus didn’t say yes this morning… I didn’t see Him walk towards my brother, or even move for that matter. What I did hear, was a reminder. It’s a miracle I’m here today. Of course I’m not in a hospital, my heart didn’t stop and then start again… but the message was clear. Jesus does not work in the ways that I understand. He moves in a dimension that I cannot yet know… He’s working a miracle in my brother’s life that I cannot yet see… yet somehow I must believe that the miracle is happening… b/c it happened to me, its happened to others around me… it will happen to him.
And so I laid there w/ my hand outstretched… desperate to touch His hand… to feel His touch… and my hand fell back on my head. Not yet. Someday. At that moment I realized I had cried myself into a headache…. And now its time to get up.
I found myself wondering, why do people have children? Parents have this enormous responsibility… they are the first to shape their child’s worldview. Whatever your parents taught you the first few years of your life… their values, their dreams, their failures, their expectations… are what their child will spend the rest of his life walking though. I find myself thinking, I don’t want kids, I don’t want to mess them up… all I want them to know is that they are loved. They only thing that matters is if they know they are loved. This is all changing my perspective of what this upcoming “judgment day” might look like… I sincerely doubt Jesus will sit there, on His mighty throne and say “why didn’t you obey Me? Why didn’t you do this or that… lets review everything you did wrong and could have done better every day you were alive…” NO. The Jesus I want to know, the Jesus worth following and believing in… I really think would say, “Didn’t you know that I love you?”
He’ll look into the eyes of the girl that grew up by herself and see her wounded heart and the baggage that she carries, and I think His heart would have to have some sadness in it. That it’s finally the end… and this creature that He created to be so beautiful never believed, never knew, that He loved her. He’ll look into the eyes of the wealthy business man who built his own career up from nothing by himself, and say “All I wanted was to live with you.”
That’s it. No rules, no expectations, no hidden agendas. It doesn’t matter if you go to church or read the Bible, whether you go to college or if you’re polite… He’s known plenty of Christians who never did do any of these. Do you know that He loves you? Look it up for yourself, the prodigal son wasn’t polite, and he didn’t follow the rules. The prostitutes on the street most definitely didn’t go to college. And the most trusted disciples didn’t have a single Bible.
So I return to my brother and find myself crying now. Doesn’t he know the He loves him? I cry out to Jesus… “Where are You? Why aren’t You here?” And
I hear Him say, “But I already am.” I think of the picture of my brother that I saw last week, his football picture, and the youthfulness of his face. This boy that I share not even a drop of blood with, yet I feel so connected to. I would give my life in a second for him to know that he’s loved… and even as that thought crosses my mind, I heard Him say, “So would I.”
All I can do is cry… sob. I lay at the feet of Jesus and I grab His robe and just cry. I imagine myself thousands of year ago, when Jesus lived on earth. He walks by and the crowds are following Him, as they did in the typical Bible stories… and I run out to just grab on. Somehow I think that just holding on to Him is enough. And so I sit at the feet of Jesus and I grab His robe and just cry.
“Come to my brother, he needs You.” I tell Jesus… and I wait for His response. I want Him to respond like He did in the stories… I want to hear Him say Yes and see Him go. I wait in my bed as I cry for an answer… begging to hear anything, a word… I want to believe Jesus cares, that He’s already on His way to him, my brother. Instead my mind flashes to something else… my heart stops and I’m in a hospital… there’s a doctor over me saying, “It’s a miracle you’re here.”
“It’s a miracle you’re here.”
Jesus didn’t say yes this morning… I didn’t see Him walk towards my brother, or even move for that matter. What I did hear, was a reminder. It’s a miracle I’m here today. Of course I’m not in a hospital, my heart didn’t stop and then start again… but the message was clear. Jesus does not work in the ways that I understand. He moves in a dimension that I cannot yet know… He’s working a miracle in my brother’s life that I cannot yet see… yet somehow I must believe that the miracle is happening… b/c it happened to me, its happened to others around me… it will happen to him.
And so I laid there w/ my hand outstretched… desperate to touch His hand… to feel His touch… and my hand fell back on my head. Not yet. Someday. At that moment I realized I had cried myself into a headache…. And now its time to get up.
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Have my eyes become dull?
Today is my brothers birthday. Normally you would find me so excited at even the mention of his name... but today I am a little discouraged. I feel like he is going through so many battles right now... and all I can do is watch, if even that, from the hundreds of miles that seperate us. The other day at our apartment I was going thru a box... yes we still have some boxes left to unpack... and I found a picture of him. His football picture from a few years ago. His face was so innocent. You could still see the child in him. If only people stayed that way, still somewhat childlike. You see a random child run by with his friend trailing behind and it always brings a smile to your face. Where is that child when he grows into a man? The child that brings instant joy into the hearts of others when they see him? Where is that sense of freedom that children have even when they don't understand?
He got so weighed down so quickly. He carries burdens that a boy should not yet have to experience. He knows things that kill his innocence and he only longs to know more... how I wish I could save him from what he now must endure to become a man.
So today I made up my mind to pray for him... but I found myself struggling to find words. What could I say to God to possibly make Him move? What hasn't already been said by me, my mother, and the few others that see past behaviors and rules to his heart?
I went for a walk and saw a flower. Actually I see flowers everywhere b/c here they grow so easily... roses, birds of paradise... these are things that people grow easily in their front yard. When I see the simple beauty found in nature, I know, without a doubt, that He cares about the smallest details, that He's involved. So why is it so much harder to see it in people's lives? Does He care less about people than He does about nature? Of course we all know the anwser is no... but I am really tempted to ask when I can see a flower spring up from concrete but see nothing in the lives of people around me. Maybe see nothing is more of an extreme statement... maybe I should ask, why not today? What does He not interfere today and free him to run and be a child again? Why not today?
I am too impatient. I already know this. The real issue I found is that I don't really believe God cares. Of course I believe He cares about nature, about flowers, about birds, even about hair on our head... but does He really care about me? I know He cares about you, thats easy for me to say and back up... but I'm finding I really do at the core of my heart doubt... it must be everybody but me. Or everybody but me and my brother... or whoever else is on my heart that week.
Does He really care about me? Have my eyes become dull? The things I once so firmly believed I now find myself questioning. Dont worry though... I already know what He's doing. I must step back and question again so that I can step forward. He's stripping me down here in LA to reveal my true core. And its not pretty.
Of course I believe He's the king.. but what is a king who doesn't really care? He is nothing but another one of the billariares that live on Hollywood hill in huge mansions w/large gates to keep what they have to themselves.
Just save my brother please.
He got so weighed down so quickly. He carries burdens that a boy should not yet have to experience. He knows things that kill his innocence and he only longs to know more... how I wish I could save him from what he now must endure to become a man.
So today I made up my mind to pray for him... but I found myself struggling to find words. What could I say to God to possibly make Him move? What hasn't already been said by me, my mother, and the few others that see past behaviors and rules to his heart?
I went for a walk and saw a flower. Actually I see flowers everywhere b/c here they grow so easily... roses, birds of paradise... these are things that people grow easily in their front yard. When I see the simple beauty found in nature, I know, without a doubt, that He cares about the smallest details, that He's involved. So why is it so much harder to see it in people's lives? Does He care less about people than He does about nature? Of course we all know the anwser is no... but I am really tempted to ask when I can see a flower spring up from concrete but see nothing in the lives of people around me. Maybe see nothing is more of an extreme statement... maybe I should ask, why not today? What does He not interfere today and free him to run and be a child again? Why not today?
I am too impatient. I already know this. The real issue I found is that I don't really believe God cares. Of course I believe He cares about nature, about flowers, about birds, even about hair on our head... but does He really care about me? I know He cares about you, thats easy for me to say and back up... but I'm finding I really do at the core of my heart doubt... it must be everybody but me. Or everybody but me and my brother... or whoever else is on my heart that week.
Does He really care about me? Have my eyes become dull? The things I once so firmly believed I now find myself questioning. Dont worry though... I already know what He's doing. I must step back and question again so that I can step forward. He's stripping me down here in LA to reveal my true core. And its not pretty.
Of course I believe He's the king.. but what is a king who doesn't really care? He is nothing but another one of the billariares that live on Hollywood hill in huge mansions w/large gates to keep what they have to themselves.
Just save my brother please.
Sunday, November 20, 2005
The People I've Met
So I've been meaning to update you all for so long now... but I've had an aversion to the email lately... meaning I just seem to not be using it like I used to. I mean I check it constantly... its the response part that seems to be killing me- maybe b/c I still, although its been 91 days since I first started my job, am struggling to balance my time between keeping up w/people, Kevin, meeting new people... This full time thing is going to take quite awhile to fully enjoy... five years of college is hard to hard to walk away from w/ a blank slate. I loved the freedom and independence of studio my last year of college... the random slots of free time to meet up w/somebody or hang out online...
LA is the lonely city. So many people, so alone. You know how you can stand in a crowd and still feel alone... well thats LA. You can see it in their eyes, in the way they act... how do I break thru their walls... how do I invite them to share their lives w/each other? How do you do that when the people you meet can live anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour and a half away and still be in the same city? ahhhhhhh. Since I recently took a strengthfinders test, I found out that one of my top strengths is relator... which basically means I need close friendships... I value honesty, and am willing to take risks to really get to know somebody. So it makes sense why I would struggle here... my relator aspect is in slow motion and I burn w/impatience and eagerness nearly every day.
But... what I really wanted to tell you about is that He is moving over here... bringing people into our lives slowly... and I wanted to tell you about a few. First of all, Jiwon... the women that works right next to me, is from Korea. She came over here to get her masters and work for awhile. She is engaged to be married next summer, so we have fun talking about that and the difference btwn our weddings. She is so kind and hardworking... in fact she is so diligent and focused it makes me feel so lazy. I really enjoy working next to her... and hope to get to hang out w/her some more outside of work but its been really hard to find a good time for us both (so far).
Then there is Erin... another girl at work. I don't get to see her as much b/c her desk is in another part of the office... but she is near my age- just graduating in May from USC. She loves to play poker so we try to have poker nights at our apt to have her over. Its been good to hear her story... I don't think she really knows how unique she is and what beauty she can share.
Then there is Cheyne... another interiors person that works for HOK (a HUGE firm that is also in KC). We were sorta setup through some architect. But... we've been trying to hang out w/ her and her husband as much as we can. Her husband is a student at a school down here... so we can easily relate w/working and student husbands. Her firm is working her hard... even on weekends too... so I hope she doesn't get too worn out!
And the last one, and a new addition, is Ashley. I just met her Saturday. We were actually set up by one of my bosses, Susan, who saw that we both played soccer and so she gave us each others email addresses and we took it from there. Ashley went to Boston College but came back to LA to live here after graduation. She has a lot of friends from high school around and she plays soccer constantly to keep her busy. She was really fun to meet w/ and I'm hoping to get to hang out w/ her some more... although it will be harder b/c our paths will cross less than we'd like.
Okay just kidding... there is one more... Pierre. He works w/me... actually sits right next to me. He's French, but he graduated from college in Flordia and then came here. He is my age and is a fun guy (meaning he is one of the few at my work that actually likes to talk and laugh). Its fun... sometimes interesting b/c I've haven't had any guy friends for awhile and I feel like he must know Kevin. The other night he came over to play poker w/us and it was fun- guess what? I won! haha. I suck but nobody can tell when I'm bluffing or not.. this is the second time in a row!
Thats it... I really wanted to tell you about these people b/c they are the ones that are on my mind the most, the ones that I really hope to become friends with, the people that I pray for whenever I can. I was also wondering if you would pray for them too... if it weighs your heart at all (if not thats totally okay).
And I am off to go see a movie!
LA is the lonely city. So many people, so alone. You know how you can stand in a crowd and still feel alone... well thats LA. You can see it in their eyes, in the way they act... how do I break thru their walls... how do I invite them to share their lives w/each other? How do you do that when the people you meet can live anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour and a half away and still be in the same city? ahhhhhhh. Since I recently took a strengthfinders test, I found out that one of my top strengths is relator... which basically means I need close friendships... I value honesty, and am willing to take risks to really get to know somebody. So it makes sense why I would struggle here... my relator aspect is in slow motion and I burn w/impatience and eagerness nearly every day.
But... what I really wanted to tell you about is that He is moving over here... bringing people into our lives slowly... and I wanted to tell you about a few. First of all, Jiwon... the women that works right next to me, is from Korea. She came over here to get her masters and work for awhile. She is engaged to be married next summer, so we have fun talking about that and the difference btwn our weddings. She is so kind and hardworking... in fact she is so diligent and focused it makes me feel so lazy. I really enjoy working next to her... and hope to get to hang out w/her some more outside of work but its been really hard to find a good time for us both (so far).
Then there is Erin... another girl at work. I don't get to see her as much b/c her desk is in another part of the office... but she is near my age- just graduating in May from USC. She loves to play poker so we try to have poker nights at our apt to have her over. Its been good to hear her story... I don't think she really knows how unique she is and what beauty she can share.
Then there is Cheyne... another interiors person that works for HOK (a HUGE firm that is also in KC). We were sorta setup through some architect. But... we've been trying to hang out w/ her and her husband as much as we can. Her husband is a student at a school down here... so we can easily relate w/working and student husbands. Her firm is working her hard... even on weekends too... so I hope she doesn't get too worn out!
And the last one, and a new addition, is Ashley. I just met her Saturday. We were actually set up by one of my bosses, Susan, who saw that we both played soccer and so she gave us each others email addresses and we took it from there. Ashley went to Boston College but came back to LA to live here after graduation. She has a lot of friends from high school around and she plays soccer constantly to keep her busy. She was really fun to meet w/ and I'm hoping to get to hang out w/ her some more... although it will be harder b/c our paths will cross less than we'd like.
Okay just kidding... there is one more... Pierre. He works w/me... actually sits right next to me. He's French, but he graduated from college in Flordia and then came here. He is my age and is a fun guy (meaning he is one of the few at my work that actually likes to talk and laugh). Its fun... sometimes interesting b/c I've haven't had any guy friends for awhile and I feel like he must know Kevin. The other night he came over to play poker w/us and it was fun- guess what? I won! haha. I suck but nobody can tell when I'm bluffing or not.. this is the second time in a row!
Thats it... I really wanted to tell you about these people b/c they are the ones that are on my mind the most, the ones that I really hope to become friends with, the people that I pray for whenever I can. I was also wondering if you would pray for them too... if it weighs your heart at all (if not thats totally okay).
And I am off to go see a movie!
Thursday, November 17, 2005
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