Moo - politics and cows

(I saw this while doing some research on politics for one of my classes this semester - what do you think? I like it.)

POLITICAL SCIENCE & ECONOMICS FOR DUMMIES

DEMOCRAT

You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful.

REPUBLICAN

You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So?

SOCIALIST

You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor. You form a cooperative and tell him how to manage his cow.

COMMUNIST

You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk. You wait in line for hours to get it. It is expensive and sour. CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows. You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows. Under the new farm program, the government pays you to shoot one, milk the other, and then it pours the milk down the drain.

AMERICAN CORPORATION

You have two cows. You sell one, lease it back to yourself, and do an IPO on the 2nd one. You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to analysts stating that you have downsized and are reducing expenses. Your stock goes up. Life is good.

FRENCH CORPORATION

You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows. You go to lunch and drink wine. Life is good.

JAPANESE CORPORATION

You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains. Most are at the top of their class at cow school.

ITALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows. Yet you don’t know where they are. While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman. You break for lunch. Life is good.

TALIBAN CORPORATION

You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two. You don’t milk them, because you cannot touch any creature’s private parts. You get a $40 million grant from the US government to find alternatives to milk production but use the money to buy weapons.

POLISH CORPORATION

You have two bulls. Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.

FLORIDA CORPORATION

You have a black cow and a brown cow. Everyone votes for the best looking one. Some of the people who actually like the brown one best accidentally vote for the black one. Some people vote for both. Some people vote for neither. Some people can’t figure out how to vote at all. Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which one you think is the best-looking cow.

CALIFORNIA CORPORATION

You have millions of cows. They make real California cheese. Only five speak English. Most are illegal. Arnold likes the ones with the big udders.