Birthday!

Its my birthday tomorrow! I will be 24 years old. That sounds so old to me... Maybe because when I was young I always dreamed of being in my twenties and now that I'm here... It doesn't always seem real. 24, married, in Los Angeles, working for an educational architecture firm. This was so NOT the way I dreamed. I thought I'd be 24, in Chicago, working with inner city renovation projects and urban families, definitely single, punk rockish at heart... haha. Sex in the City last night talked about how it is so easy to see others clearly, but you always feel like you can never really see yourself. How can our opinions of ourselves be so ambiguous and unclear... When we can easily define and understand those around us? I have no idea. Its like me thinking I was fat in high school and then now when I look at pictures, I realize I was not. So much wasted time worrying about fat. I wonder now how much time I worry about things that only appear to be real, but in fact, aren't. Perception can be such a tricky thing. Funny thing is, I still struggle with that fat thing occasionally.

Anyways, to celebrate my 24 years and the life I never dreamed of (but am thankful that I have) we (Kevin, Josh and I) are going camping one night near the beach just north of Malibu. I took off work tomorrow so we can sleep in and then go boogie boarding during the day. (That was one of my birthday presents... Two boogie boards, b/c I can't swim or do anything in that huge, murky, cold ocean by myself so I made Kevin get one too.) Probably the best gift of all though, I must say, is getting to hang out with my brother and my husband. No material thing could ever equal the gift of their presence in my life today.

I'll write more on Monday!